Better than the doctor...
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack said to Mike behind him, “My
elbow hurts terribly.? I guess I had better see a doctor.” “Listen, you don’t
have to spend that kind of money, ” Mike replied. “There’s a diagnostic computer
at the corner drugstore. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell
you what’s wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten
dollars…. heck of a lot cheaper than a doctor!”
So Jack collected a urine sample in a small jar and took it to the drugstore.
When he deposited his ten dollars, the computer lit up and asked for the urine
sample. He poured the sample into a funnel and waited.Ten seconds later, the
computer ejected a printout: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water
and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.
That evening while thinking about how amazing this new technology was, Jack
began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, stool
sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, scraped some
oil off the driveway and masturbated into the mixture for good measure. Jack
hurried back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposited ten
dollars, poured in his concoction, and awaited the results.
The computer printed out the following….
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant…twin girls. They aren’t yours. Get a lawyer.
5. Your Volvo needs rings.
6. And if you don’t stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get
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